LAW ENFORCEMENT AGENCIES VICTIM'S SAFETY PLAN & CHECKLIST DATING VIOLENCE
You have the right:
- to be protected from abuse
- to press criminal charges against your abuser
- to seek the court's assistance
- to prevent further abuse
- to seek assistance from community programs
YOUR LOCAL LAW ENFORCEMENT AGENCIES
ST. TAMMANY PARISH SHERIFF'S OFFICE
MANDEVILLE CITY POLICE
SLIDELL CITY POLICE
COVINGTON CITY POLICE
PEARL RIVER CITY POLICE
ABITA SPRINGS CITY POLICE
FOLSOM CITY POLICE
SUN CITY POLICE
MADISONVILLE CITY POLICE
ST. TAMMANY PARISH SHERIFF
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE DIVISION
Slidell: (985) 726-8000
Covington / Mandeville: (985) 898-2352
ASSISTANT DISTRICT ATTORNEY
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE DIVISION
Slidell: (985) 646-4083
Covington: (985) 898-5290 OR (985) 898-2392
Parish-wide: (985) 626-5740
Slidell: (985) 643-9922
Covington/Mandeville: (985) 624-4939
VICTIM'S SAFETY PLAN AND CHECKLIST
- Pack a suitcase to store with a friend or neighbor. Include a change of clothing for you and your children, toilet articles, and an extra set of keys to house and car.
- Keep Special items in an easy-to-locate safe place, so that you can take them with you on short notice. These items should include medicine and prescriptions, I.D., extra cash, checkbook, savings account book, credit cards, legal documents and social security cards or numbers, and car keys.
- In case of emergency, know exactly where you will go and how to get a family member or friend to confidentially help you.
- Know where you will go and what you will do if you cannot escape the violence. Call your doctor or go to an emergency room if you think you are hurt.
- Call the police. Physical abuse is a crime, even if you are living with the abuser.
- You should not clean yourself or your house. Do nothing that might alter or destroy any evidence until it has been witnessed, recorded, and/or preserved by a police officer. Evidence that should be witnessed, recorded and preserved includes blood or blood stains, hair samples, semen samples, grab marks, bruises, scratches, torn clothing, damaged or tipped over furnishings, alcohol containers, pictures of the victim and surroundings, x-rays, doctor's reports, and witness statements by you and anyone else who saw or heard the violence. Review you safest plan as often as possible in order to plan the safety way to leave your batterer.
- If you are thinking of returning to a potentially abusive situation, discuss an alternative plan with someone you trust.
- If you have to communicate with your partner, determine the safest way to do so.
- Have positive thoughts about yourself and be assertive with others about your needs.
- Read books, articles, and poems to help you feel stronger.
- Decide who you can talk to freely and openly to give you the support you need.
- Plan to attend a women's or victims' support group for at least 2 weeks to gain support from others and learn more about yourself and the relationship.
- If an argument seems unavoidable, try to have it in a room or area that has access to an exit and not in the bathroom, kitchen, or anywhere near weapons.
- Practice how to get out of your home safely. Identify which door, window, elevator or stairwell would be best.
- Have a packed bag ready and keep it in an undisclosed but accessible place in order to leave quickly.
- Identify a neighbor you can tell about the violence and ask that they call the police if they hear a disturbance coming from your home.
- Devise a code word to use with your children, family, friends, and neighbors when you need the police.
- Decide and plan for where you will go if you have to leave home (even if you don't think you will need to.)
- Use your own instincts and judgment. If the situation is very dangerous, consider giving the abuser what he wants to calm him down. You have the right to protect yourself until you are out of danger.
Always remember - YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO LIFE FREE FROM THREAT OR VIOLENCE.
What you need to take when you leave
________ Driver's License / I.D.
________ Children's Birth Certificates
________ Lease, Rental Agreement, House Deed
________ Bank Books
________ Insurance Papers
________ House and Car Keys
________ Medications / Medical Records
________ Address Book
________ Social Security Card
________ Welfare / Medical Cards
________ School Records
________ Work Permits
________ Green Card / Passport
________ Divorce Papers / Marriage License
You have the right to...
- Be treated with respect and dignity
- Act one way with one person, and a different way with someone else
- Pay my own way
- Change my mind
- Keep my friends
- Say no, to anything
- Break up, fall out of love, or leave a relationship
- Not be abused, physically, emotionally, verbally, or sexually
- To be myself and not who someone else wants me to be
Battering (abuse) tends to escalate over time, leading, in some instances, to homicide/suicide. FBI, 1979
Are You in an Abusive Relationship?
One in three women who are killed in the United States are killed by their boyfriend or husband. Barrie Levy - In Love And In Danger
PLEASE DO NOT FEEL AFRAID, ASHAMED OR GUILTY TO RECEIVE MEDICAL OR EMOTIONAL ASSISTANCE. NO ONE DESERVES TO BE ABUSED!
Comments or jokes that make you feel bad
Making you feel guilty for spending time with others
Sometimes frightened by your partner's behavior?
Afraid to disagree with your partner?
Apologizing for your partner's behavior? (even when you have been treated badly)
Verbally assaulted and put down on by your partner?
Avoiding your friends or family because of how your partner will act?
Afraid of breaking up with your partner because you fear being hurt?
Forced to have sex even when you don't want to or are uncomfortable?
Be careful of those that express anger inappropriately
"I can't live without you" , "you are the only person that understands me"
Your partner may try to use this as an excuse for the abuse
Needing to know your every move, making you carry a beeper
Making all the decisions, such as what you wear, eat or ignoring your comments
Nice one minute and fly into a rage the next
One in four, or 28% of high school and college students surveyed said they had experienced violence in a dating relationship. Barrie Levy - In Love And In Danger
For Victims of Dating Violence
The Abuse is NOT your fault
You do not deserve to be abused
You CANNOT change someone who is abusive
Over time, the abuse ALWAYS gets worse
Make a SAFETY Plan to follow when the abuse happens again
If violence occurs once in a dating relationship, it is likely to occur again. Barrie Levy- Dating Violence: Young Women In Danger
Staying in the relationship, getting married, or having children will NOT stop the abuse
Been hurt, shoved, choked, grabbed, thrown down, or had things thrown at you?
Been criticized or embarrassed in front of others?
If you answered "YES" to any of these questions, it is time to check your relationships.